A Ski Trip Gone Bad
by Makaru Yuli
Summary: Read the name. Okay, a little cussing is in here but thats it. Have fun. I am... *laughs insanly* +3&4 UP+
1. Getting Ready

((Author's Note: Okay guys, this happened when I got bored the first day of summer vacation and none of my friends were home. Just a warning, never jam three boxes of Nerds(you know, that Willy Wonka candy) down your throat at 2:30 in the afternoon. It proves nothing except that you can get hyper any time of the day. Oh yeah, those disclaimer thingies... I'm not saying them. I wouldn't be writing this if I owned the GW boys, now would I? As for the actual words of ownership... HEERO!!!!  
  
Heero: She doesn't own us, thank the heavens and above for that wonderful thought. We would be dead by now if she di--  
  
Makaru: Shadup! Okay, you guys read this while I drop a hammer on Heero's foot! :)  
  
Heero: Not again!!!))  
  
//blah blah blah\\ ~ that's thought (something I'm not capable of)  
  
*blah blah blah* ~ And that's action (I don't do much of that unless I'm typing)  
  
A Ski Trip Gone Bad  
  
Chapter 1- Getting Ready  
  
  
  
Duo: *collapses into a seat on the private bus Quatre has rented for their trip* So, we going skiing or not? If so, get your asses up here or I, the god of death, will have to kill you all.  
  
Heero: Shut up, Duo. Why don't you come help us?  
  
Wufei: Yeah, you have more luggage than all the rest of us combined!!!  
  
Trowa: ... //What's in this suit case?!\\  
  
Duo: Careful with that, Trowa! Those are my hair care products! *pats his hair lovingly*  
  
Quatre: And it's the biggest bag... Go figure.  
  
Wufei: I don't wanna go! Why should I spend time with you pansies, anyway?  
  
Quatre: It's quality time, so you've got to come.  
  
Heero: Just do as he says or he'll start lecturing us, okay?  
  
Wufei: But, but... fine, you stupid wusses.  
  
Heero: *glares and pulls out his gun* What did you call me?  
  
Wufei: Uh... not you, Heero! I, uh, meant the rest of them!  
  
Trowa: *frowns, drops the hair care bag on Wufei's foot and looks around innocently*  
  
Wufei: OOOWWW!!!!!!!  
  
Duo: MY BAG!!!  
  
Quatre: //Maybe this wasn't such a good idea...\\  
  
Heero: *throws another bag into the bus's storage space* Can we go yet?  
  
Duo: Yeah, please?  
  
Trowa: * gets on the bus*  
  
Wufei: *limps onto the bus, falling several times in the process* Let's just get it over with.  
  
Quatre: *shuts the storage area* Okay, lets go!  
  
*The bus starts without him and starts down the path with Quatre chasing after it.*  
  
((Author's Note: All right, that's the first chapter and... I'M ALREADY OUT OF NERDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Okay, I'm going to the store. Tell me how you like it and tell me what you want to happen on the bus ride there. It already includes soda, hyperness, and Wufei getting thrown out the window... or, more acurately, through it. Don't worry, Quatre does get on the bus... after a few miles. Oh, and please, no flames. My summer vacation just started and I don't need ridicule, okay? My mom already started it off right by refusing to let me go to the last dance/party of the year cuz I got a C+ in science. It's not THAT bad, okay?! *yells to her mother* YA HEAR THAT?! I did pass, no da! Argh. Okay, gotta go buy more candy...  
  
Later,  
  
*Makaru Yuli* )) 


	2. New Window Needed

((Author's Note: Okay, I'm back. Actually, my mom's gonna kill me if she gets home. I'm sick today so I'm staying home, but my mom said to stay in bed and NOT to use the computer. -___-;;; did she think that would WORK?! Oh well. Here's the next part. Where'd I put my Nerds?))  
  
Chapter 2- New Window Needed  
  
Trowa: *Sitting in the front of the bus reading a book on strategic war maps* //Where has Quatre gone? Normally he'd be singing now...\\  
  
Heero: *Sharpening knives, looks out the back where he's sitting* //Who's that little guy running after the bus? A spy maybe? I should kill him.\\ *smiles*  
  
Duo: *sitting in the isle brushing his hair* 86 bottles of beer on the wall, 86 bottles of beeeeeerrrrr... Take one down, pass it around, 85 bottles of - -  
  
Wufei: STOP! SINGING! Now!!! I'll cut of that damn hair of yours if you - -  
  
Duo: Beer on the wall. 85 bottles of beer on the wall, 85 bottles of beeeeeeeeeeer... Take one down, pass it around, 84 bottles of beer on the wall. 84 bottles...  
  
Wufei: Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...  
  
Heero: Don't worry, we can kill him on the slopes, and let his corpse go down on skis as he leaves a trail of blood. Then we can follow the trail and see if he hits a tree.  
  
Duo: Pass it around, 82 bottles of - - *Eyes get wide, gasps*  
  
Wufei: *smiles* Heero, I think we're going to be GOOOOD friends...  
  
Heero: Not likely.  
  
Trowa: Hush, I'm listening to Quatre scream.  
  
Quatre: *from behind the bus* STOOOPPP!!! Please, I beg you! Stop! I'll give you a cookie! No, a hundred cookies! More than that! Just stop!!!!  
  
Heero: o_O?  
  
Trowa: O_o...  
  
Wufei: o_O;;;  
  
Duo: O_o! Cookie?  
  
*Bus stops quickly*  
  
*WHAM!!!*  
  
Wufei: What was that?  
  
Heero: *Looks out the back window* That was Quatre getting plastered to the back of the bus.  
  
Trowa: Great...  
  
Duo: Does he have a cookie?  
  
Heero: Yes.  
  
Duo: Then let him in!!!  
  
Quatre: *gets on* Hi... every... one... *collapses*  
  
Wufei: Wuss. You're all wusses! Everyone of of you!!! Quatre with his love and peace! He makes me sick! Trowa, the silent piss head! Ugh, Duo, mister girly man! And Heero! Perfect soldier my ass! your not perfect! I am!  
  
Heero: *picks up a crowbar*  
  
Duo: Up to bat is Heero, the perfect soldier!  
  
Trowa: Play ball!!!  
  
Wufei: Huh? Oh, uh, um, Heero... put it down! Down! Not up! what are you doing?! HEERO!!!!!  
  
Heero: *Swings*  
  
*Wufei flies out - - no, THROUGH the window*  
  
Releena: *in a car behind the bus* Heero!!!  
  
Heero: *lets the bat go, as it is still in motion*  
  
Releena: *Gets hit with the bat, swerves off the road and into a ditch where she and her Maalox pink car go up in flames*  
  
Duo: A HOME RUN!!!!!!  
  
Trowa: *smiles*  
  
Quatre: Heero, that wasn't very...  
  
Heero: You wanna go too?  
  
Quatre: *holds up little flag that says 'go Heero' on it* Yay?  
  
((Author's Note: I won't let duo come to harm, Trowa won't get hurt unless he runs into a tree (which he prolly will), and Heero can't get hurt cuz I like him, but the other two may suffer sever physical injuries, trauma, and mental problems. Just letting you know. Wufei will prolly die, but Quatre has to get them home, so he'll be at least conscious for part of the way home. Maybe. :) Okay, I found my Nerds so I gotta go do my homework. I think I'm flunking Health, so I'll go do that. I do have a test in it tomorrow... review and, if its really bad, flame, but I have come backs for stupid questions, no da. Ja ne, *Makaru Yuli*)) 


	3. Duo's Got Candy

((Author's Note: I have nothing to do and my mom is being a b****. Such a nice relationship I have with these people!!! GAUGH!!! I'm going to grow up to be the odd little guy living next door who was always SO quiet until he went on a killing spree, no da? Anyway, it's the 1st of January and we don't have an internet service. Well, I'll update as soon as possible. eh. bored.))  
  
Chapter 3: Duo's Got Candy  
  
Duo: *Bangs his head up against the window* I am SO bored!!!!! God, can't we do something?!  
  
Quatre: *huddles beneath his seat* Sshh! Heero found another crowbar!!!  
  
Heero: *hitting the seat infront of him with the crowbar in tune with the song on the radio* We will, we will rock (WHACK!) you. We will, we will rock (WHACK!) you.  
  
Trowa: *still reading a magazine* Let him have his fun.  
  
Duo: AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! B-O-R-E-D!!!! *runs to his backpack* I need sugar!!! *cries* The God Of Death needs food!!! Sugar is my only food source.  
  
Heero: Here. *tosses Duo a bag of tootsie rolls* Now shut up. You're messing up my beat. *starts hitting the seat again*  
  
Duo: *hops up and down* Yay! I love you Heero!!! *runs up and kisses Heero*  
  
Heero: *starts twitching* eh..?!  
  
Trowa: //Now that was not right.\\ o_O;;;  
  
Quatre: Oh god.!! *burrows into the floor as best as he can*  
  
Duo: *realizes what he just did* O____O. EEEEEWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!  
  
Heero: *calmly, still twitching* Exactly.  
  
*Both of them run for the little bus bathroom screaming EEEEEWWWWWWWWWW!!!*  
  
((Author's Note: This is just a quick filler. I'll get more updated later. *Makaru Yuli*)) 


	4. Wufei Comes Back

((Author's Note: I'm really sorry I haven't updated lately, but we just moved to Florida on the 27th of December, I couldn't get on a computer until the 31rst, and I didn't get internet till a WHILE later. I've been suffering from withdraw... *spazzes out* Hey, ya know, I just realized my computer spellcheck doesn't register the word 'spazzes' and thinks it should be splashes. o_O;;; Splashes out? How odd... Anyhoozle, I think you guys have been waiting long enough for this chapter so.... TADA!!!! Here it is! They are alive!!! Although I don't know where Wuffei ran off to...*grabs a new box of Nerds*))  
  
Chapter 4: Wuffei comes back  
  
Duo: *sitting on the floor still, now braiding his hair* 16 bottles of beer on the wall, 16 bottles of beeeeeeeeerrrr...  
  
Heero: *holding a new crowbar lovingly* That song's not so bad once you get used to it...  
  
Quatre: *sitting near the middle of the bus with a brace over his broken nose (from running into the bus)* ...Take one down, pass it around...  
  
Trowa: *Very quietly* 15 bottles of beer on the wall.  
  
Heero: *Looks out the back window* Oh, now isn't this a sight to see. Wuffei has come back to us.  
  
*Everyone stops singing and hops over to the back of the bus to peer out the window.*  
  
Bus Driver: *looks in the mirror*  
  
Wuffei: *Has hijacked an old folks home tour bus and is careening down the highway, laughing insanely* Come on Heero!!! Use the crowbar now!!! You can't, can you? Wanna know why? Because I have it!!!!!! See?!?!?! *holds up a really bent up crowbar*  
  
Heero: *Opens the window* Hey Wuffei!!!!  
  
Wuffei: *Sticks his head out the driver's window of the old folks bus* What is it, weakling?!  
  
Heero: Guess what we have!  
  
Wuffei: *blinks* What?  
  
Heero: Extra crowbars!!!! *holds out three crowbars*  
  
Wuffei: *eyes get bigger, pauses* But I've got all the old people!! You can't throw crowbars at old people!!!  
  
Quatre: He's got a point...  
  
Heero: No he doesn't. Since when is it against my nature to not kill innocent people that are standing in the way of me achieving my goal?  
  
Duo: *Suddenly sticks his head out the window* Hey Wuffei!!! We don't have to use the crowbars!!! Look up!!!  
  
*Heero, Quatre, Trowa, and Wuffei all look up*  
  
Police Helicopter: This is the police! Stop the vehicle immediatly!  
  
Wuffei: *Eyes get huge* Never! not to you scumbags!!! *Drives away wildly*  
  
Quatre: We need to get off this bus...  
  
((Author's Note: Okie then... that was actually really fun to write. Well, I've just come up with a new story idea and I want to go meet the girl across the street. Which house was hers again? It was right across the street... but there are two there... -_-;;; I'll figure it it out... eventually... Ja ne, *Makaru Yuli*)) 


	5. Teddy Bear

((Author's Note: Alright, the last chapter seemed to be a success and people appear to be wondering when the skiing will happen. This is your lucky day! Here goes nothing.))  
  
Chapter 5: Teddy Bear  
  
Heero: This bus ride is taking forever.  
  
Duo: Are we there yet?  
  
Quatre: No.  
  
Duo: Are we there yet?  
  
Quatre: No.  
  
Duo: Are we there yet?  
  
Quatre: No.  
  
Duo: Are we there yet?  
  
Quatre: No.  
  
Duo: Are we there yet?  
  
Quatre: No.  
  
Duo: Are we there yet?  
  
Quatre: Yes.  
  
Duo: Really?  
  
Quatre: No.  
  
Trowa: It's snowing, so shut your traps and enjoy it.  
  
Quatre: Oh, Trowa, are you in a bad mood?  
  
Duo: *starts playing hand games with the seat in front of him* Miss Susie had a steam boat, the steam boat had a bell.  
  
Heero: There's the ski lodge up ahead..  
  
Duo: Miss Susie went to heaven, the steamboat went to hello operator, please give me number nine, and if you disconnect me.  
  
Trowa: Duo, shut up.  
  
Duo: I'll kick you from behind the frigerator, there was a piece of glass. Miss Susie sat upon it and broke her little-  
  
Heero: Ass! We know the damn song, Duo! Now shut the fuck up or I'll get out the crow bar!!!  
  
Duo: o_O.  
  
Trowa: Woo hoo.  
  
Quatre: We're here, guys.  
  
Duo: Really?  
  
Quatre: Yes, Duo, really.  
  
Duo: Yay!!! I'm going skiing first thing! *hops to the front of the bus*  
  
Heero: I'm getting my guns.  
  
Quatre: I told you not to bring any, Heero!  
  
Heero: And I would listen to you. why?  
  
Quatre: Because I'm in control of this trip!  
  
Heero: And that's why I have the crow bar, right?  
  
Quatre: Right! Wait, no! Gaugh!  
  
Trowa: I'm going to get coffee.  
  
*Bus stops and Duo runs out, puts his snowboard on, and goes up the mountain. Trowa walks off calmly and looks up at the mountain*  
  
Trowa: Why are there so many trees? *walks into the ski lodge looking for some hot coffee*  
  
Heero: I'm going to see if our oriental highjacker friend is here yet.  
  
Quatre: I. I. I. I want my teddy bear. *sits down and sucks his thumb, grabbing a teddy bear and huggling it*  
  
((Authors Note: Yay, the next chapter will involve Duo looking like a pro on the slopes, Trowa flipping over trees, Heero getting impatient with another skier, Quatre trying to ski while holding onto his teddy bear, and Wuffei will make a comeback! Mwahahaha!!! Till then, Ja ne! *Makaru Yuli*)) 


End file.
